Pants Suck.

So, I was unable to blog this long time because, as you may or may not know, my friends in the amish community, catholic guilted me into not blogging because it was evil. But, it is a new month, so I feel spared from their wrath. So, I, in David Letterman style, have ten reasons why pants suck.

10. They are not as comfortable in the pool.
9. When the temperature reaches above 85 to 90, the pants make your legs all hot and sweaty.
8. Mr. Santrach believes in a pants-optional approach to the back nine, and it seems to be working for him.
7. It is well known that Knickers are and always have been the coolest golf lowerwear.
6. Pants ends with ants which can get into your pants and make you itchy.
5. There are just times when leggings make more sense.
4. Without pants, you can check which direction the wind is blowing by looking at your leg hair (if you are gifted enough to be Italian).
3. It is unnatural to wear pants. No baby has be created or been born with pants. Go ahead and try to disprove it.
2. Gotta show off your beautiful calves for the ladies.
....and ......
1. The pants on the ground video from American Idol. Pants are most famous for when they are off. So, clearly that is where they are meant to be. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dqGv3BWLqqs (pants on the ground vid)

~ The pantless Hogie

The Power of Pants

I escaped late last night from the captivity of a band of backwoods-blog hating survivalists. That's my excuse for not blogging in a while. Mr. Bulter, what's yours? Anyways, relax and enjoy "The Power of Pants".

The PGA tour has a dress code, as I am sure you are already aware. Mainly, it requires its players to wear pants. Shorts, skirts, kilts, capris, pedal-pushers, plus fours, knickers, european short pants, capes, and robes are not allowed. This can cause angst from the players especially in hot weather, but would you really want to see John Daly in shorts. I didn't think so, you see enough of that at your municipal golf course, where one might wonder if there is an unspoken rule about not wearing pants... or clothes that match. Sure in the fall season you encounter the foursome in jeans, but rarely do you find classic Dockers stutting the fairway. Growing up playing muni courses, I would wear basketball shorts and a tee shirt. I was comfortable, and I never really tought too much about it. Then I was introduced to the exlcusive world of private golf, and along with it I came to understand the power of pants.

Everybody has the one article of clothing that they love to wear because they know they look great in it. Be it a favorite pair of jeans, a cute top, or a daring leather jacket everybody has something to wear the fills them with confidence. If you are a golfer, wearing pants can fill you and your game with confidence. You have been watching professional golfer play golf your entire life, and everyone of them was wearing pants. Therefore you have a strong correlation with great players and pants subconsioucly in your brain. Dressing like a tour player, encourages you to elevate your game to match who you are imitating. Standing over a shot looking down at well pressed trousers mhmmm that's what I'm talking about. Dress the part. Play the part. Need more convincing? Here are several more reasons to wear pants on the golf course.

1. Tradition. Class up any course by dressing like you are playing Augusta.
2. Well fit pants with the proper colored belt and color coordinated shirt can be increadibly slimming.
3. Skin cancer is the most common cancer among young people 18-25 years old. Good old cotton fibers can protect the backs of your lower leg from the damaging UVA/UVB rays of the sun.
4. You won't have an awkward leg tan line. Pale is the new tan.
5. Every winner in the history of the PGA tour has won in pants.
6. Poisin ivy can strike anywhere, unexpectedly. Protect you legs with pants.
7. Wear pants, shoot lower scores. I garuntee it.

Black Bear

Bear's U.S. Open Prediction

Johnny Miller wins every U.S Open he announces, maybe more so than he did in 1973. The entire world get to hear him talk, and criticize, and complain, and talk some more for 4 days. But who will shot the lowest score this week? Well, Hogie, I can tell you it is not going to be Lee Westwood. His putting is fine, but the rest of his short game is woefully inferior to his competitions. Like you said, U.S. Opens are about scrambling around the greens, something he simply can't do consistently under pressure. Phil is going to make a charge Saturday, but he'll utlimately fall short in the end. Hunter Mahan is very streaky , but if he shows up this week, watch out! Tom Watson, really Hogie? I love the guy, but come on! His putting would never stand up under the pressure. So... who do I think will take home the Championship Cup? Mr. Eldrick Woods, for several reasons. The course is playing fast and firm. Players aren't hitting too many drivers out there, in fact they are teeing off with mid and long irons. The rough is minimal, by U.S. Open standards, and it is going to come down to making putts under pressure. Putting is courage. Putting is will. Putting is art. Maybe no one else in the field has something greater to prove to the world, than Tiger. That is why, behind announcer Johnny Miller, I predict Tiger to win his 4th career United States Open.

United States Open Prediction

Well the greatest four days of golf is head. The US Open is were the art of making a bogey is both special and necessary. This week at Pebble Beach will be very beautiful I am sure, unless of course, you are a scorecard. The scorecards will be bleeding squares hoping to survive the 18 round fight against the wind, sun, rain, tigers, lip outs, and worst of all Johnny Miller. Nothing is harsher on the golfer than Johnny Miller commentary. The only thing I have to say to Johnny is: The reason you are in the booth is that you can't putt! Putting is the most import thing as we know. I digress. I am really excited for this US Open for 5 huge reasons. (Prediction to follow).

1. Tiger Woods is around. Where is Tiger going to be? No one can answer that for sure. This is the 10 year anniversary of when he decided that he was going to punish every record at this very golf course and show the world that no one is even close to his golfing prowess. This week could be great or awful, who knows?

2. Lee Westwood. This guy has been painfully close, a lot. The question is want will he do this week. He is the Tiger Woods of letting it fall away. The question is will Westwood continue his best Greg Norman impression or will he be able to break into the winners circle. Last week, he did a good job in the playoff, but can he do it in a major? This should be a good story to watch.

3. Amateurs! The US Open is open to ANYONE that qualifies. That means that even your next door neighbor good sneak into the field on accident. This usually have really great stories and are fun to watch. Hopefully, one of these great stories can make a run at the title.

4. Tom Watson. Basically this guy is popping up on major leaderboards a lot. Watson had that great run at the British Open and opened the Masters with a 67 this year and ended up finishing under par for the week. Watson has won at Pebble Beach before. He hit "The Shot" here that was the chip in from the thick rough on the 17th that helped him hold off Jack Nicklaus in 1982. That was 28 years ago and I still want to see what he can do. This man is incredible.

5. Can someone finish under par? The last time the event was held here in 2000, only one man did. Tiger woods finished -12. Next guy (Ernie Els) was +3. So, it will be close I am sure. And the US Open always has some interesting winning numbers.

So, that is what I will be watching, but who will be holding the trophy? Lucas Glover again? I think not. But, my pick is clear. See point 2. Lee Westwood gets it done. His ball striking is solid and after the win last week, I think he has confidence. All those past failures will help guide him through this one.

~ Hogie

What soccer can teach us about golf

I was watching the US-England match in the World Cup today and I realized how much you can learn about golf from soccer. Golf is a sport and golfers are athletes. As a result, golfers can and should learn things from other athletes. Anyway back to the point. I was watching the game and watching the teams play near the midfield line and it was a thing of beauty. Passing between holes, judging the speed of defenders, and their intended target; it was very cool. They didn't kick the ball with "perfect mechanics," but instead did what got the job done. This is much like putting.

This took me back to when I watched the PGA Championship at Hazeltine on the Wednesday practice round. An amigo and I watched Adam Scott on the putting green. He was putting very poorly and he was with his coach correcting his back angle and checking his hands for their perfect spot. He struggled to make many putts. He was very rigid over the ball and looked a Thwomp ready to be pounded by a Mario jumping somersault. He was never going to make any putts. Why you ask. Well, it is simple he was not playing soccer. Yeah, I said it.

Putting is like soccer near the midfield line. You have to be loose and thinking about your moves. They have to have purpose and you can't be tentative. You need to pick your target and go for it. You can also lose those "perfect mechanics" that Adam Scott was working on and simply do what gets the job done. Sometimes we fail to remember that golf is not about the strokes you take, but rather the number of strokes you take.

As Jack Nickolaus once said, Golf is 90% mental. Golf is not about being mechanically correct. It is about being mentally capable of winning. Bear gave us a great example of that in the last post. But, I am going to take it one step further. You need to focus on what you want the ball to do before you hit it. There needs to be a purpose and reason for hitting it, otherwise don't hit it. Let this reason be the guide for your next shot, not mechanics. Because as an athlete you should react.

So, going back to soccer. Pick your target (who you want to pass to) and pick a hole and kick it. Let that be the guide. Don't kick the ball down the field with perfect accuracy and power, if no one on your team is there! What is the point? So, the more you watch the World Cup, watch the players pass the ball near the midfield line. Use what you see there on the golf course and know knows, maybe you will get a lucky goal too.

~ Hogie

The Death of an Illusion

You are on the 17th hole. The tee box to be exact. It is a long, demanding par 4 dogleg left. Thus far, it has been the round of your life. You birdied no. 1, no. 2, and chipped in for par on no. 3 to keep to the momentum. You were splitting fairways like it was your job, and hitting greens like it was your profession. Putts couldn't stay out of the cup. You made the turn at 4 under par 32. Your confidence was through the roof, and expectations of "the greatest round of my life" began forming in the back of your mind. You surpress them for a while, but a 25 foot birdie putt on no. 12 bringing them rushing to the forefront. So there you are on the 17th tee. Deep red 8-under par. Your buddies are patting you on the back. This is it. The round you have waited your entire life for. The swing. Crap. It's going left, and hard. You can feel it at impact. The left wrist flipping over and left, the toe of the club smothering the ball. You watch the ball scream left, left, left, then out of bounds. The entire world feels as if it has come crashing down around you. You feel sick, terribly sick, and nobody can possibly understand. The encouragment of your friends seem like mocking gestures of faceless shadows. You finish triple bogey, double bogey...

To borrow some famous words, "nothing hurts more than the death of an illusion." See it wasn't a perfect round of golf on the 17th tee box. Golf is 18 holes, and you have to play all of them. Life is trickier because every day is a new hole, and you have no idea how many you have. It isn't easy, but you have to stay mentally strong. How do you do that? Listen to your emotions, but don't always trust them. You can't control what emotions you feel, but you can control how you react to them. Expectations of the future have appeal, but they creat a false sense of security. Goals are good, expectations are deadly. Like Ben Franklin said, "little strokes fell great oaks." You reach big goals by completing a series of smaller steps. What is important here is that you are always focusing in the present moment. Perhaps the greatest test in golf, and life for that matter, is not how you achieve greatness, but how you respond to adversity.

Black Bear

Matt Butler Found!!!!

Call off the search party! Like Jack from Lord of the Flies, I have been saved by a ship. In the name of Comcast, a miracle occurred. Internet was birthed at my lovely apartment with the help of Rass. Birth, as we know, is a traumatic and difficult process and this was no different. With eggplant cooking in the kitchen and the landlord fixing up blinds, there were people working everywhere. Nevertheless (correct spelling), soon the internet emerged young and innocent. So, we cleaned it off (with a towel, naturally) and brought it to this very website, so it could learn about the world and all it needed to know. So, I will save Tyler now. Driving for show gets you nowhere unless you have that putter making you dough. So, I am here to make that dough. So, be ready for a new era. We aren't like Domino's. This isn't going from bad pizza to still bad pizza. This is going from greatest blog ever to the greatest blog ever. Be ready. Put on your sunglasses, the sun is ready to shine over a new era and boy will it be bright.

~ Hogie

Mr. Butler MIA

Matt Butler, you might know him as Hogie, has not written a blog post in quite some time. You are probably growing anxious. I can sense it. Well, I am writing this blog to explain why. There really isn't a very easy way of saying this. Oh god, please give me a few seconds while I gather myself. Deep breath. Okay. Swallow. Something just terrible has happened. Something I wouldn't wish upon my biggest rival, which just happens to be Mr. Butler. Are you ready? I think I am going to be sick... Okay, okay. Matt Butler has been, oh say it isn't so, he has been left without... ... internet service for the past week or so. Somone call the national guard, the coast guard, or even Comcast. Oh the humanity. Poor kid. No one deserves to go through something like that, not Hogie. The worst things always happen to the best people. Is it karma? Maybe? Who can say? I am organizing an all night walk-a-thon fund raiser for him this weekend. I mean somebody has to step in here and do something. What are we expect him to do? Walk a block back to campus and use the internet for free there? Come on. Let's get real. I think we have all learned a valuable lesson from that oil spill: when catastrophy strikes, we need to act immediately. I have trying to keep this blog alive by myself, but I just can't do it alone. I can drive for show fo' sho, but who is going to putt for dough? Never-the-less (don't get me started about the correct spelling of that word) we must move on.

Black Bear

Walking the Line

Jonny Cash may have said (because that's how he sung) it best, "I walk the line." Living is walking a fine line between many extreems. Euphoria and saddness. Pain and extasy. Madness and indiference. Dead and alive. We are the tetherball of a pendulum that swings to and fro with every mighty swipe of fate. Life and our place in it is far more delicate than the spinnings of a spider's web. Fargile and malleable are our construction of reallity itself- a mere tower of cards built atop a rickety serving table by an old tremebling man with Parkinson's disease. So... what does all this figurative language have to do with golf.

In golf you have an objective: get the ball in the hole using the fewest amount of shots. But you have further focus. You can't just pick the ball up, and walk it to the green, and drop it into the hole, No, no. You have golf clubs to "assist" you. There are no rules about strategy, course management, or even what your shots have to look like. Yes, there is a rule book, but for the sake of making a point, the aforementioned "rules" are abundant in autonomy. But a player has seen the pros play, at least on TV, and they have, at one time or another, open a golf magazine or book. These mediums of golf information steal the autonomy from golf. You see the pros hitting 64 degree wedges from the fairway, and you never even consider running the ball up with a 5 iron. You read about "how to swing a golf club" when all this is impartant is to swing it. If you "swing" it in the direction of intent, you are in really good shape. The problem is determining where along the objective heirarchy do you focus your attention.

A. Your goal is to shot a low score. How do you do that? Take less swing on the golf course. How do you do that? See you are stuck since nothing directly relates to taking less swings on the golf course.

B. You goal is to make good swings. How do you do that? By understanding your golf swing. But this still doesn't translate to taking less golf shots which is the ultimate objective, because the intent is purely on the swing.

These examples are extreems and every player falls somnewhere between them, The secret to playing golf is to walk the fine line between the two. I can't tell you how to do it, no one can. Discovery happens in the mind of curious.

Bear

Response

Hogie,
Grace would probably chose player A so she could "hit the ball like a pro" regardless of the score. Also we both know that I am player A and you are player B in this little scenario, but you have forgotten about player C. Player C snap hooks his drive 245 yards into the left rough, then smokes a 3 wood 235 yards down the fairway, anf holes his wedge shot for a 3. That's the kind of guy I want to be. Someone who get's it done. Period. Luck flies on the wings of talent, soaring high above the randomness of chance. Fear not the player with the sweet looking swing, so rythmical you dose off watching it, but fear the player who appears to get lucky, for he has talent beyond measure- unless someone invents a device to measure talent, like a talent scale.

The worse you are at math, the more incentive you have to be good at golf, nay on second thought, consistant at golf, maybe both?

Black Bear

A Lesson in Math

Two people play a 550 yard par drive:

Player A

1 300 yd drive
1 250 yd 3-wood
3 putts
TOTAL: 5 (par)

Player B

1 200 yd drive
1 150 yd 3-wood
1 100 yd 6 iron
1 putt
TOTAL: 4 (Birdie)

Which would you rather?

~Hogie

Aloha from Jersey! Yes, I am on holiday out east, but I brought my blog with me, along with some other things like my spirit of adventure, my love of ginger ale, and my tooth brush. Today's lesson centers on the trials and tribulations of one young Mr. Matt Caminiti. The time was a little after 12, the place: Tuxedo Country Club. We began on the long, blind-tee shot of the 1st hole. A par 4. Matt made short work of it and made a 17 footer for the birdie- something he had never done before. Riding the surge of confidence, the Jersey native closed out the front with a sloppy bogey on 9, but carded a solid front 9 score... 38! Holes 10 and 11 were played and pared. Hole 12. A long dogleg left par four requires a well placed drive and an accurate approach. The swing. Left. And Hooking. Dammit. Triple bogey 7. He was clearly rattled. He said his round was over. I replied, "A round of golf is 18 holes Mattie, not 12. Finish strong." He struggled into the clubhouse with a 45. Bobby Jones said he never learned anything from a tournament he won. Learn from your mistakes. Play all 18 holes of golf.

Bear

A Good Walk Spoiled

I have a real treat for you guys tonight. We have a guest author, Mr. Eric Nelson of Chicago, Illinois. The former City Champion http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vUv1U0lQ7TA and long-time friend of mine shares his thoughts on enjoying this game we call golf.

Bear

“Golf is a good walk spoiled.” The words of Mark Twain that accurately describe the four hours that us golfers spend chasing a ball around miles of grass, sand, and water. Countless quotes and descriptions of the game sing a similar tune, many that are too true for a hobby that wastes afternoons and drains bank accounts. Bear with me, if you will, as I lay out a scenario and ask yourself how well it describes your typical round of golf.

8 a.m. – Arrive at the course, excited for the day.

8:30 a.m. – Warm up session at the range. Shots ranging from perfect to near shanks leave raise questions as to the on course performance.

9 a.m. – Tee time. The beginning of what promises to be an enjoyable 4 hours.

Skip ahead to the end of the front 9...

11 a.m. – Finish the front, most likely less than ecstatic over the final number for the 9. Could have been better, but a snack and drink at the turn provides the needed enthusiasm to take on the new, unmarred back 9.

11:45 a.m. – The round is progressing similar to the front. Whatever knowledge or swing flaws corrected on the front are clearly being offset by the grease from the burger at the turn. No worries. Let’s finish strong.

12:15 p.m. – Fatigue is setting in. Each swing requires an increasing amount of concentration and effort. Lies appear to be getting worse and worse. Fatigue and frustration have a positive relationship.

1 p.m. – Handshakes on 18. The 19th awaits with promises of a chair and table to calculate scores.

1:15 p.m. – Head in hands, profanities slowly tumbling from lips, the number on the scorecard seems to be climbing ever higher.

1:30 p.m. – Questions of how the round went pull answers of, “Been better.” “Wasn’t my day today.” “Can’t complain too much.” As the images of lip outs, missed greens, failed up and downs fill the memory banks.

2 p.m. – Get the hell out of the parking lot...

I’ve tried to be fairly positive with this play by play. I have had exponentially worse experiences on the course, as I’m sure many of you have. Until recently, I have been satisfied with getting my round in and driving from the course with a somewhat sour taste in my mouth. Interesting how rounds rarely end how you would like them to.

I had a revelation a little while ago after a day at the course with Bear. Having been at school for the past 9 months, I had 4 rounds of golf and 3 range sessions under my belt. The driest 9 months I can remember since I took up the game. We began the day at 5:30 in the morning. Coffee in hand, we began the hour-long drive to the course for our 7 a.m. tee time. Without a range, the day began with a session on the putting green. The crisp morning air, dew covered grass, and sun pulling itself over the horizon. It was a great day for golf, save the 30 mph wind that picked up around the 8th hole.

Being my first day back to the game, and a new swing in tow following a single session with my coach, I was overjoyed to par the first hole and be making solid contact a majority of the time. The match with Bear stretched the whole 18, with him closing it out on the last hole. I can only hope that the final score for the round was below an 85. It was not pleasant golf to watch, but was one of the most enjoyable rounds in recent memory. So enjoyable that we decided to spring for the $32 replay rate and zip around again (this time in the comfort of a cart). I bested him in the 2nd round with a birdie on 18, closing with a 79. Thirty-six holes is a lot to accomplish by 2:30 in the afternoon, and as exhausted as we were, it was one of the best golf days I’ve had.

A week later we set out again to play 18, but this time I had a different feeling about the round. I was playing similarly to our previous outing, but could not accept my poor performance. I was constantly trying to pull my spirits up, only to have them crumble with a hooked drive or blocked approach. It was a tiring mental battle that I was destined to lose.

Nubar Gulbenkian said, “It is more satisfying to be a bad player at golf. The worse you play, the better you remember the occasional good shot.” While this may not hold much weight for competitive golfers, the theory behind it stretches to all levels. Golfers with low expectations do not need much to be rewarded, whereas skilled golfers are often disappointed with anything less than perfection. Poor golfers are rarely seen scowling around the course and are often the ones laughing hardest and truly enjoying the game.
Think back to when you began playing. A poor shot was a poor shot and a good shot was reason to celebrate. Numbers at the end meant bragging rights for a few days as opposed to a reason to question one’s very existence. It is this joy that is lost when golf is taken too seriously and The Game of Golf becomes a burden rather than a game.

The point I’m trying to make is not to take the game less seriously (I spend hours working on a single move on the range), but have fun playing. Have fun improving. Be able to look back at where you started and where you are now with a smile. After every round, reflect - keeping in mind the game aspect. Four hours were spent playing a game you love with people you enjoy. Experience first, results second. Improvement adds to the enjoyment. It is not the source.

My challenge for your next round: have as much fun as possible on the course. Concentrate on each shot, but forget the outcome. At the end it will have been a great time and the number will seem secondary.

Enjoy the game.

~ Eric Nelson
Contributing Author

Yesterday

Yesterday, double bogeys seemed so far away,
Now it looks as though they're here to stay,
Oh I believe in yesterday.

Suddenly, I am not half the player I used to be,
There's a snap hook hanging over me,
Oh, yesterday come suddenly.

Where my swing went I don't know,
It wouldn't say.
My swing plane is flawed,
Now I long for yesterday.

Yesterday, golf was such an easy game to play.
Now, I need to find the next fairway,
Oh I believe in yesterday.

Bear/ The Beatles

Beached Continued

Let me ask you a question. What do you see more of on he beach: Bears or delicious hogies? The answer is simple, hogies (especially if we are talking Jersey Shore baby). So, let the Hogie teach you about the beach. Now, I do believe Mr. Bear gave a great outline of the Bunker shot, if you were already good at them. But, there are those (I was one of them at one time) who go to the beach and literally are so scared they are wishing for anyone to help them. Have no fear, for I am here to help (like a golf superman).

The first thing you need to do is well, pick a club. Many people automatically go with their highest lofted club (like a 60 or 54 degree), but wait. A bunker shot is like any other shot. You want to pick a club that is good for that distance. So, if you are close to the flag go with your highest lofted club. but, if you are in the front bunker and the pin is in the back, then maybe a PW or something lower would work. You don't want to pick a club that makes you nervous for the distance. You want to be as relaxed as possible.

So, the next thing, is getting you feet even with the ball. You see the pros swishing their feet side to side to get lower, uh, you should do it too. If not for the reason of it making you look profession, which is half the point. This allows you to swing on the same plane you always do. So, if the ball is way below your feet, keep digging!

Alright, so now is the big time. At this point most people ask themselves if they are going to skull it over the green 50 yards away or hit it fat and have the same shot again. But, what I think about is: if this were a chip shot what would I do? A little different than most, I have always been, but you should try it too. Imagine it as a chip (sandless) and practice that swing over the ball without hitting it (can't hit the sand or the ball, unless you want a penalty stroke). Where it should land, the height ect. This will ease your mind and make you focus on the shot. So, from that visualization, you want to make that swing at the ball.

Now it comes time for the swing. You have your "chip" specs decided. Once you can visualize the shot you are ready. The visualization will help you hit the ball, you will be amazed, it is true. Now, the ball should be in the front of your stance, but by gosh you aren't hitting that ball! Pick a spot 3 inches behind the ball which should be the middle of your stance. That becomes the ball, where you will swing. So, take that swing that will give you the chip result (the one you did over the ball).

Now, the club will hit the sand first (it better or that ball will be flying out at a speed dangerous to anyone around). The biggest mistake people do at this point is finish high. DON'T DO THAT! That is the mot common reason people skull it. You need to finish low and finish all the way. Stopping your swing at the sand will cause you to hit it fat. So, focus on hitting your sand spot, then focus on powering through the sand. Swing through the sand and hard until your swing runs out of steam. Let it happen naturally.

Obviously practice makes perfect, but hopefully these ideas will help you while you are sweating out on the beach hoping for a good outcome. But just remember, if you ever see a bear on the beach, run. Bears are not good playmates.

~ Hogie

Beached

The amatuer player, the weekend duffer, whatever you decide to call him, or her (don't want to play favorites, no that's for grandmothers and teachers) fears green side bunker shots. Hogie, I know what you might be thinking, what are you, the long hitting black bear, doing talking about short game and writing in these very long winded, wordy sentences. Maybe he's right. I am not a short game guru, or William Faulkner, but I am so slouch around the greens. "Don't sell yourself short judge, you're an incredible slouch" (Caddyshack). So, here is how to play the green side bunker shot:

1. Imagine there is a valuable jewel on the beach that looks suspiciously similar to a golf ball. You can keep it, and become the richest man (or woman) in the world, if and only if you can get it into a bucket several yards away. Ahhhh, but you can't pick it up with your hand. Dammit. Instead you have to only a golf club, a sand wedge. Instinctively, you wouldn't want to sratch the jewel, no you would splash it out. Lesson Over.

Maybe Hogie can offer you a more technically sound method for bunker play, but for now, this will suffice. Hogan, the guy from the 50's (not his reincarnated self ala Mr. Butler) would aim for green side bunkers at the US OPEN since the greens were too fast for long putts. You may not get that good at bunker shots, but... you can get pretty darn close. Claude Harmon taught hitting bunker shots with only his right hand. Gary Player practiced spinning a 3 iron from green side traps. Some players use the Texas Wedge to escape a low liped bunker. Chi Chi Rodreguez says he was born in the sand (literally he was born on the beach somewhere, no). Anyway you look at it, bunkers are nothing to fear. Children playing in the sandbox at the park tis all it is.

Bear

How to Read A Book

1. Firmly hold the book in your hands, or place the book on a desk or table, ensuring that the spine of the book is left on the sigittal axis plane.

2. Open the book to page 1., or if you like, to the forward if there is one.

3. Read across the page from left to right. Many amatuer readers (aka 1st graders) don't know what to do when they finish reading a line of text. Mmmmm yes, quite a conundrum indeed. Read the line of text directly inferior to the current line of text.

4. Read until there are no more pages to turn, or sentences to read.

5. Congradulations, you have learned to read a book- something far more useful than reading a green.

Bear

How to Read a Green

The most important part of making a putt is reading the putt correctly. In order to get the right line, you must know how to read the green so you know what the line is. Many people get down on their knees and look at the hole from behind the ball or in a spider pose like Camillo. But whatever you do, make sure you do these five things. While this is a good start, it is by no means the only thing you should do when reading a putt. Like any addictive process, it too has a 5 step process.

Step #1

Mark your ball. Use your lucky penny or a Ritz cracker like Happy Gilmore, but this is important. What this does and it mentally prepares you for the upcoming putt. Once you mark your ball, you are in putting mode. You have to detach yourself from the previous shot you hit, good or bad. It is time to putt and this is your cue to focus on that. Go to your happy zone if you need too, just don't punch Bob Barker.

Step #2

Step back lean down and check the line. Get an opening feel of the line. But, at this point your main focus should be whether the putt is uphill or downhill and looking for any big ridges. So, the uphill/downhill factor may be obvious, but sometimes it is not. You just want to get a feel for what the speed will be like. Also, look for any big ridges that will heavily influence your putt. If there are, you need to separate the putt out into two putts, having a line your each side of the ridge. We will go over this later. But, after looking behind the ball, you should have an idea of speed and also what big ridges are if your way, if there are any.

Step #3

After this, you should walk to the other side of the hole. But, you should walk on the bottom on the line. By that, I mean if you think the putt will move to the right, walk down the right hand side. This allows you to visually look at the slope, up the slope. So, while you are walking you can check out the slope. You should always be looking. Then, look at the line from the other side. This gives you a better idea of the line. You get a different perspective and this allows you to further pick your line.

Step #4a

If there are any big ridges, this step is a must. What you must do is look at the putt as two putts. Focus on a line for each side of the putt and line up the two putts as you would if they were by themselves. Also, stand where the ridge is to look at the line from there.

Step #4b

Now, after all that background research, you make a final read of the green from behind the ball like you did in step #2. This is where you finalize your line and speed. With the help of the other looks, your read should be more clear.

Step #5

Replace your ball. Now, you are ready. You should pick a line and a speed and be ready to roll (pun intended). You need to stay confident on your read and hit the putt.

So, that is the five step process. This may seem really long, but it is doable. You can start it when other people are putting and you don't need to look behind the hole for an hour like Ben Crane (he is slow, sorry, but the truth hurts). Just be respectful of place of play, but this is the key to getting a good line. Happy Putting!

~Hogie

No Love for the Glove

Of the top 50 players on the PGA Tour, only one player hits the links without a golf glove. Lucas glover defies his sirname by breaking the traditional mold. I too, in addition, choose not to sport the leather for the following reasons:

1. Golf glove$ are expen$ive.

2. They wear out fast especially in high humidity.

3. I lose them at an alarming rate.

4. If you were on a date with a cute girl, you would want to feel her soft hand against yours. Golf is the same. You want that sensual connection with your golf club.

5. Cord grips are found in the bags of champions, and in the hands of gloveless legends the world over. They make golf gloves obsolete.

6. Lucas won the rainiest U.S. Open in history without any assistance... form a glove.

7. O.J. Simpson gave gloves, of all kinds, a bad name.

8. It is diffiuclt to find a good fit, just ask The Juice.

9. Golf is not boxing.

10. Tommy Gainey. Some people just go too (two) far...

~ The Gloveless Bear

The Greatest Moments in Golf

It may be fun to hit a driver, but the greatest moments in golf have all occurred on the putting green. I mean think about it. The great joy of sinking that winning putt is show below.















Look at these great moments in golf. The first picture was Justin Leonard making the winning putt at the 1999 Ryder Cup. The second putt was Mickelson's winning putt of the 2004 Masters. The third picture in the 1969 Nicklaus-Jacklin concession in the Ryder cup. The fourth is Payne Stewart's winning putt in the 1999 U.S. Open. So you may look good by hitting the long ball, but you can can only realize that you are the champion if you, well, actually win.

So, if you still want to drive for show, then I will take the trophy and see you later.

~ Hogie who putts for trophies

Just a trend I noticed...

Hogie is a handsome gentleman, let me tell you, but on the PGA Tour long hitters are better looking than their slick putting counterparts. Let's take a look.

Some of the game's big hitters: Alvaro Quirosthe- the long hitting Spanish heartthrob. Slammin' Sammy Snead- rockin' the sweater vest. Adam Scott bitting a golf tee in a sexy manner. Aaron Baddeley's sweet looks to match his sweet swing. Mmmmm yeah! Drive for show- a great looking show.

Now let's examine some of the games best putters:

Brad Faxon: ladies I bet you want to send him a fax. Ben Crenshaw looks like a depressed mime. Loren Roberts has a girl's name. Bobby Locke sporting the ever classy scrappy mustache.

Now let me ask you... would you rather drive for show, or putt for pizza dough?

~Black Bear who drives for show

A Putting Stroke

Putting can be one of the most shameful aspects of golf. Missing a 6 inch put can put you to tears. It is rough, and more importantly embarrassing. But, it doesn't have to be. Putting can also be a great show-off too (you hear that Bear?). Making a 60-foot snake on the last hole can make you turn into a Chi-Chi sword master. But, there is no one secret nor one putting stroke. That is why the title is A Putting Stroke, not The Putting Stroke. Each person has a personal relationship with their putter and putting stroke. It is more than spiritual, it is sensual.

Everyone wants to know how to make every putt. How do you do it? Well, it my opinion there are three keys. That is it. The is no right way to hold a putter. Do what ever makes you feel comfortable. I suggest trying out a bunch of them before you settle. Take the relationship with your putter to the next level. Try new positions, why not? Spicy up your putting life a little. Ok, ok, on to the keys.

Key #1- Ball Placement

How it Works: Make sure your eyes are directly over the ball. You can check this very easily. Set up to the ball like you were going to putt. Then drop a ball from your nose, and if it hits the ball, then your eyes are over the ball, if not, continue the drill until they hit.

Why it Works: This is important because you can feel the line better. This may not make sense. But you can feel the putter going back and through on line because it is going under your head. Your head is the center of the putting stroke and putting it in the physical middle helps center the golf ball. All good putters do this. They may have a crazy grip, but even Briny does it and he has a crazy stance (see photo)!

How to ensure you will always do it: After you find the spot where your eyes are over the ball, you measure it with your putter. Measure from the ball to your feet line in terms of putter length. For me it is one and half putters. So, each time you dress the ball, you measure out from the ball your special distance and then that is where you put your feet.

Key #2- Hands Forward

How it Works: Make sure your hands are ahead of the ball

Why it Works: It is important because you want to start the ball rolling. Dribbling is good for basketball, but bad for putting and makes it extremely difficult. So by keeping your hands ahead of the ball, you have a better chance of getting the ball off to a rolling start

How to ensure you will always do it: Well, look down and check. This is easy. Just make sure your hands are ahead of the ball

Key #3- Confidence

How it Works: You will never make a putt if you don't think you will make it. So each time you stand over a putt, you need to think that you are going to make it.

Why it Works: The putting stroke can easily be changed by your mind. It is short and slow. Your mind has plenty of time to mess with it. If you think your line is wrong, or that the speed (draw weight for you curlers in the crowd) will be wrong, you will instinctively change your line mid-stroke!

How to ensure it always happens: This is tricky. Confidence comes from success and success comes from confidence. But, there is a way around it. Start with short putts. I used to putt 100 three footers a day. Once I made them all everyday, I knew I was a good putter. Allow your practice to set you up for success. Let it give you confidence, whether than means 20 straight two putts from 80 feet or making 20 2 footers in a row, do it.

That is it! You must feel like a better putter now! It is okay, I don't either. Good putting is like fine wine. Great taste is in every grape, but it just needs the proper nurturing and aging to become great wine. Everyone can be a good putter, you just have to coax it out of yourself (don't try snake charmers, didn't work for me). You will get really frustrated through the 4 putts, but you will celebrate the 40 foot birdie putts that are holed. Putting is not something that can be tackled in one blog post, but this is a start. Fall in love with putting. Lord knows its hard falling in love with humans, but putting will always be there, sometimes too much.

~ An Italian Hogie on Rye

The Golf Swing

I am about to give you the gift of distance wrapped in a parable tied together with a ribbon of comedy. Not only am I going to help you hit it father, after reading this article you will be hitting it "striaght as a farmer". The greatest tool you have on the golf course is your mind. Bob Rotella calls it your 15th club. The great Robert Jones said golf was played in the six inches between your ears. Many people interpret this quote to mean that you control your emotions and keep cool on the golf course. While this is good advice, it misses the point. Jones was saying that golf swing doesn't just happen, your brain tells your hands to swing the club up over your right shoulder (for a right-handed player) and then swing the club toward the target and all the way to the finish with your arms (by arms I mean your upper-arm or humerus bone for all you osteology student's out there). There is no such things as muscle memory; your muscles don't have brains. If they did, there would be no "dumb jock" stereotype. Unless you are aware of what you are doing, mentally, you are bound to make mistakes. It is like driving a car, you have to think about where the car is going and turn the steering wheel and press the gas to get where you want to go. Even on your commute to work, a route you have driving thousands of times, you have to have mental purpose to drive the car. We all learned to drive a car with relative easy, some of still struggle from time to time, and the golf swing is no different.

The golf swing is a swing, not a leveraging action. There is no pulling, or pushing of the club since there actions move in a line- the golf swing is a circle. Anytime the club is parallel to the ground, it must also be parallel to the the target line. This is geometry of a circle: according to the legendary instructor Manuel de le Torre, "Anytime there is a circle, it is on a plane. All the horizontal cords of that circle are parallel to each other and to the tangent on that plane that represents the target line." But a swing as no good unless it has direction. The club should be swung at the target. If you want to hit it father, swing your arms faster from the top of your backswing all the way to the finsih. The body will respond to the swinging of the club, all that is required is the mental image of the club swinging in a circle as described above and the body will assume visually pleasing positions. It sounds simple, but that's because it really is. Golf is a game that really should be enjoyed more than it is. So is backgammon, if anyone is looking for a game.

~Black Bear

Biography of Black Bear as authored by Hogie

Tyler was born in Chicago on September 1st, 1990 at the ripe age of 41. Many thought he was destined to be Benjamin Button. The only thing is rather then getting younger, he continued to age. He drank fine wine while watching classic movies. His exquisite taste grew well beyond that of the rest of his peers. That is why in the fine month of August 1999 he took up the game golf. Not just to revel in the beauty of the landscape, but also to live the life of the classic 50 year old he had become. After his rounds he has been known to take long walks on the beach while enjoying classical Bach thinking about the importance of the Central Limit Theorem. The man was a legend unlike any other. He had the classic swing of Jack Nicklaus. How could he not? He tickled (a swing that sweet would never hit a golf ball) the ball down the fairway. However, getting the ball in the hole? Well, that was for the young-ins he would say. Not for people as fair as him. He was not going to stick his beautiful hand into a dirty hole. No reason. He is all pizazz and glamour. But, as every Italian knows, dough is the key to a good pizza, just as it is a good golf game. So, I will have my pizza and eat it too.

~ Italian Hogie on Rye

Biography of Hogie as authored by Black Bear

Matt was born April 3, 1990 in Basking Ridge, New Jersey with a full beard he wears handsomely to this very day. But, this town in the Garden State couldn’t hold him, no, no for the West was calling his name. It started as a whisper, “Go west young Butler. West Texas. West Texas.” He spent his formative years bouncing between Rochester, Pittsburg, Chicago, Harrisburg, and Cincinnati. Baseball became his passion, his obsession, his Daisy Buchannan. In the summer between 6th and 7th grade Hogie took up the game of golf, began showing symptoms of OCD, and started shaving twice a day. It was a pretty big summer. Several years later, the call of the West convinced him, grabbed him by the wrist (actually fracturing his sphenoid bone) and dragged him to Dallas, Texas. The wrist injury and consequential surgery robbed the once powerful player of his prodigious length. Unable to pipe it 300 down the middle, Hogie was forced to hone his short game. Mmmm yeah, that’s what gets the ladies excited -a good lag putt. Oh yeah. Seriously, though, he is one hell of a putter. There is a saying that you drive for show, and putt for dough. Listen up Hogie, since you are an NCAA athlete, you can’t accept cash prizes, but you can show off. Using Bangworthy’s phrase if I may good sir, when the big stick is functioning well, you put on a show, you entertain, you inspire, and you realize that you are a champion.

~Black Bear

True rivals are rare, like those Pokémon cards with the stars in the bottom right corner. From my estimation, they come about only once a century, maybe less. Two champions pinned against each other driven by destiny, determined by fate- that is rivalry. History has produced legendary pairs of epic adversaries- Edison and Tesla are a classic example. Their dynamic was… um electric, sparks flew let me tell you. What? You haven’t heard of Nikola Tesla (Niki T. as he was known in less formal situations) okay maybe the names Matt Butler and Tyler Hanck ring a bell. Hmmm, yes? Macalester College? Golf? Well, maybe this blog will shed some light on these gentlemen. As for Tesla, consult Wikipedia.